Saturday, January 23, 2010

Cognizant.

Today I ate out all 3 meals. Today I think I did alright. I worked out, I've been tracking, I've been making smart choices with the options in front of me. Today I did what I needed to do.

It will be really close this week. While I've been tracking and working out, I've also had several bad weeks in a row and I think it's finally time to pay the piper. The scale hasn't budged all week, and I only have 2 days left before weigh in. But tonight I was thinking about it and I had a new realization. It doesn't really matter how much longer it takes for me to get to goal. 70 days...700 days; who cares. What's important is that I get there. I know, more than ever, that I will get to goal. I don't know how to describe to you that I know it, but I just do. I've been learning quite a lot about faith lately, and one thing I realized this past month is that once you decide you're going to believe in something, you just have to believe in it. You can't question it anymore, or doubt sets in and offsets faith. You can't wonder. You can't think about it at all really. Faith is taking a few steps into the dark before the light comes on and gives you clarity and sight. If you didn't believe that working out helped, would you do it? Of course not. And yet we don't see the results immediately- do we? We have to have faith that all the work we're doing now will pay off later and we will then be able to create our dreams and make them a reality.

I'm not going to keep doubting the process. I'm not going to keep questioning my every move. I know what I'm doing- I've lost 15 pounds. I WILL GET THERE.

D


2 comments:

  1. This is the best post you've ever written...! You're confident. You're aware. And you're doing it.

    I understand the feeling of just knowing you'll get there, and I think that's probably one of the best feelings we can have before we get there.

    You are awesome...

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  2. Diz! Yes, you will! I know it, too. :D LOved the analogy of "taking a few steps into the darkness before the light comes on and give you clarity and sight." Just beautiful and an inspiring description of trusting God. Thanks for that. I'm going to tuck that sentence away for future reference. Deb

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