I've been thinking a lot today about what happened last night. Thinking about it over pizza and ice cream- today I had 2 more pieces for breakfast and then a couple of bites of the ice cream. And then something amazing happened. I kept thinking about NR...I think she had some tea this morning and that's it. She usually starts out her mornings with a cup of tea while she reads a little and gets ready to start her day. While I was munching my cold pizza for breakfast, I kept mulling over how she starts her day. The pizza suddenly didn't taste good anymore and I tossed the rest of it away- half a freaking pizza! Same with the ice cream. Eating it for some reason makes me feel disappointed in myself and sick. I want so bad to make this work- eating that crap just makes me pissed at myself.
NR is gone all weekend so I'm going to use this opportunity to really focus on being good and working out a lot. She doesn't hinder me in anyway, if anything she motivates me, but I still feel like I do best when I'm focusing on these things alone. I'm a little nervous because I'm going up to LA tonight to hang out with the old roommate and I know we're going to dinner, and then I have a bridal shower over lunch tomorrow. Food food food. When you're trying to avoid it, it seems to come at you from every angle. When you want it, it's there. If you don't want it- wait a couple of hours and eventually you'll want it again.
I'd love to elaborate more but I have to get ready to go to LA- hope you all have a fabulous night!