Sunday, May 16, 2010

Sunday Funday.

I've had a lot on my mind lately.

Mainly my thoughts have been about this blog.  Yesterday I received a comment that really bothered me and which got me thinking about the purpose of this blog.  When I originally created it, it was because I was beginning a weight loss journey and I was hoping that this would be a safe place where I could voice my concerns, my struggles, and celebrate my triumphs with people that understood the journey I was on.  I was seeking friendship and occasionally advice on how to overcome hurdles and find success.  I have always tried to offer supportive comments to my fellow bloggers and cheer them on their journeys because that's what I thought the purpose of these blogs were- for find friendship and support.

But as my life has changed and as my focus has changed, so have my posts.  I started writing about things that didn't relate to weight loss because I was receiving so much advice and support in my weight loss struggle, that I started hoping I could receive the same type of advice and support for other aspects of my life- mainly dating.  It's another realm that is blurry and difficult for me at times.  I'm not always sure that what I'm doing is right, and I hoped that because most of my followers are honest and care about my best interests, that I could trust their comments to help me see clearly in the decisions I have been making in other areas.  Your comments have been supportive and encouraging, and I thank all of you for that.  Seriously, I am so grateful for every minute you have taken to either read my blog, or commented on my posts.  Whether it was support, congratulations, or advice, I have loved all of it.

But when I received this particular comment yesterday- I started thinking.  In "real life" I am a very private person, and part of the reason I am so private is because I don't like people judging me, or thinking that because I've chosen to share something with them, they are suddenly entitled to express their opinion of what I am doing, whether it's right or wrong.  Sometimes their comments and opinions are helpful, and sometimes they are not.  Either way, it's hard to always see that they are being supportive, even when they are doing their best to be so.  Yesterday I felt that familiar feeling that someone else's opinion was more important than my learning experience.  I did not feel that the comment was supportive or encouraging at all; which was hard for me because I have tried so hard to only be supportive in my comments on other blogs and I guess inherently expected other people to have the same courtesy on my blog- although I've never actually expressed that because I've never realized that that's how I felt.  I merely was trying to state that I missed the feeling of having a real connection with someone- even if that person was someone from my past who was not the best fit for me.  But here I am trying to defend my own comment on my own blog, which irritates me all over again.

The bottom line is I've decided to withdraw talking about anything on this blog besides weight loss again.  I'm not even sure I'm going to keep the blog going at all, to be honest.  It served it's purpose in my life and I have not been needing it as much as I have in the past- which I'm sure you can tell through my attitude of my posts lately.  I'm a little hesitant to get rid of it all together, so obviously it is still serving some kind of purpose for me.  But even if I do keep it, it will only be about weight loss, as it was originally created to be about.  I'm just not in the mood for anything that is not positive or uplifting.  I get judged enough in my real life, I don't need any more judgments on my blog, even if they are meant to be helpful.

As soon as I've made my decision as to what I'm going to do with this thing, I'll let you guys know, of course.  Again, I am so thankful for every word that all of you have written on my blog and in my life.  You have been huge in helping me grow and learn about weight loss and myself.



  1. Oh God - now I'm going back wondering what I've commented. I hope it wasn't me cuz I love you to pieces! Please don't leave. Please.

  2. I love love love you Diz...If you want to nix the blog then okay, but please keep being my friend..ok? ::hugs::

  3. Oh DIZ I love you! Please don't EVER change. and I am sorry you felt you have to defend your self. Alot of people(Me) use the blog world as a safe haven. And honestly weightloss and life are realy hard to seperate. If you ever need to chat feel free to email me at

  4. i would very much miss reading your blog if you deleted it, Diz. but whatever you have to do to stay positive, i hope you do it. even if you stay and just blog about weight loss, i'll take you any way i can get ya! xoxo Josie

  5. D, I would miss you and your positive energy terribly, but you have to do what's right for you! I hope I didn't offend you in any way. If I did, I apologize to the ends of the sincere earth!!

  6. Aw! That's so sucky that happened! Big thumbs down... I've really enjoyed reading your blog, its so honest and relatable.

  7. You can't leave because Katie J. is sending people your way!

    The hard part about blogging is deciding how much to reveal. When you do you make yourself vulnerable to anonymous comments and/or written comments that don't quite come across right.

    Only you can figure out what to do, but if you started to blog for yourself, don't let anyone chase you away.

  8. LOL @ Helen!

    We would understand whatever you decide but we would miss you sweetie! Sorry to hear that happened though.

  9. Im honestly speechless.

    I love you Diz, and would be very sad to lose you as a friend, but completely understand what you are saying and support your decision, whatever you choose to do.


  10. Oh no, I am sorry that happened. I doubt the writer even knew it, and hopeful that their intentions were nothing but good. I don't see how anyone could come here and offer you anything but support. But opening up and becoming vulnerable is very difficult. And well leaves you susceptible to criticism, weather meant as constructive, or as advice or feedback and with such tender matters I know how it can quickly put one in a denfensive mode. No one should feel that way. I'm sorry that happened. I know I read the post, and gosh golly don't know if I did reply or not. I know I thought to weather or not I had the time and did - but I know I am pretty blunt sometimes. That's the thing with our online relationships, we don't really know one another's personalities, which can open the door to foot (or keyboard) in mouth situations.
    You do what makes you comfortable, share what you want to share. I personally was really enjoying getting to know all the sides of you and seeing your picture become more clear, but opening up about the deep matters of the heart, things that we ourselves are still making sense of of course is personal on a different level. But there are people out here that want to support and offer a hand in friendship encouragement or a virtual shoulder. I hope you continue blogging.
    It's been lovely getting to know you. I wish you nothing but happiness in what ever you decide to do, but I hope you stick around. I'd miss you.

  11. Oh Dizzy this really sucks.. I will support you no matter what decision you make but I want for us to stay in touch regardless. No matter what!! Your blog and you have been an inspiration to me. I adore you and I'm so glad we've gotten to know each other and I hope we will always remain friends. Keep us posted sweetie, we'll miss you!!! But you're not gone yet so I'm going to stop talking like you are!!!!!