Saturday, March 27, 2010

The Suit Sitch.


I knew this day was coming.  I did, in my head; I knew it was coming.  But for some reason, it still seemed like it might be a ways out, I mean, it IS March.  Barely spring...I thought I had time.

B and L wanted to go lay out.  I mean, they should- it's 80 degrees here and they were just telling me that it was dumping snow yesterday where they're from.  Of course they want to lay out.  It's California; it's what we do here.  We're known for our beach bodies and the laying around in swimsuits...all year long.  Of course.  What did I think they would want, to sit in the dark whole of my apartment for the weekend?  Every time they come, we lay out all day.  Of. Course.

For all of the forgiving I've been doing lately (of myself), you'd think I'd be okay with laying out today...but thinking about putting on my suit sent shivers down my spine.  I am NOT ready for swimsuit.  I stalled by telling them I needed to go get a bikini wax before I could get in the suit, and then I pulled up one leg of my shorts to prove it.  They both laughed hysterically and told me I needed to reclaim my 'woman-ness' and get that under control.  (Picture them both pointing a finger at my crotch while I am positioned in a crouching position behind my car, trying to prove that my "situation" is REAL and out of hand.  I know, TMI, but it's true people!  There is no way in HELL I am putting on a swimsuit with all of that going on).  Anyway, they excused me for one hour to go get 'cleaned up'.  Instead I rushed home and started writing this post- I'll obviously be stalling longer than an hour while they lay at the pool with all of my local friends (I saw a group of them laying on the lounge chairs as my roommate came to let them in the gate).  Heaven help me.  Right now, heaven help poor DIZ!!!!  Of course today is the day that all of my bloating and fullness is at an all time high.  Maybe it's not, I'm not sure, but it suddenly FEELS that way.  We had a HUGE breakfast this morning at La Creperie in Long Beach- If' I'd known suit was coming immediately following breakfast, maybe I wouldn't have ordered the Belgian Waffles with strawberries, whip cream, and nutella.  Um, thanks big fat breakfast- for making my stomach pooch out another 5 miles.

But I wanted to add this little moment we had last night before I forget.  Last night when the girls first got here, we were discussing things that have been happening in our lives, getting each other caught up on the daily drama, and my friend L mentioned something that I thought was fabulous.  She was recently going through something and one night while talking to her family about it, her brother said something so poignant.  He said,  "L, God wants you to dream bigger."  She went on to explain that God, (and her family too) knows that she is capable of so much more than she is aware of in herself right now.  So she needs to expand that vision of herself and her capabilities.  How true is that.  And of course, I thought of myself, and of us (you guys, my readers too).  How much more would we achieve if we dreamt bigger???

I wish I could apply that to my swimsuit situation right now. Ha.  Ok, getting queries as to my whereabouts.  Gotta run!!  Please pray for those around me, that they will not be scarred by the vision they are about to have while I make my way to a lounge chair.



  1. hahaha.. oh my.. I love you! I don't even know what to say except that. Let us know how that sitch works out for ya. I can tell you're not gettin' any or you would not have a sitch to begin with... hahaha. Sorry sister you know I love ya.. haha

  2. Lol, you're hilarious D! I'm sure you looked cute, and all that "bloatedness" was in your head.

    I love the new blog look!

  3. Diz I spit my ice tea out when I read this! The lengths went to delay the swimsuit! lmao. I know wearing a bathing suit is hard but look how far you come. I am sure you should feel a lil better than when you started this journey

  4. Even though you made it sound fluffy, I know you were truly experiencing panic. It's hard to unlearn our phobia of wearing small pieces of Spandex fabric in public.

    So, now it's over, and you've learned that Belgian waffles do not mix with laying out. OK, you can move forward with that knowledge.