Yesterday was a huge day for me- dieting wise. It wasn't a perfect day by any means, but I did make some huge strides. I got really stressed out yesterday because I was slammed at work and started thinking I needed some sugar to compensate for my stress. I was on day 5 of no sugar; for the 2 nights previous to yesterday I had gotten a total of maybe 5 hours of sleep (between the two nights together), and I was craving like a crack fiend. BUT I DIDN'T GIVE IN. Did you read that right? YES YOU DID. It was a huge accomplishment for me, and one that I am SO proud of.
Nevermind that I am FULL of pizza and cookies right now- and reeling from the worst stomach ache. But I'll get to that.
So I came home from work last night and I was on a high from overcoming my cravings by myself and moving on, and then I remembered I had a date. That's right, it was a triple date, and I knew that we were going to the International Food Fair in Orange. And I knew that it was going to wreak havoc on my diet and I also knew that I wasn't going to be that girl in a group of people that couldn't eat anything. I also knew that there would be probably nothing I could eat at said fair that works with Fat Flush guidelines. That's alright, I committed in my mind that while I would go and have fun and eat, I would watch what I ate and avoid sugar if I could. Starchy carbs, while they should be out of the question, I was pretty sure I couldn't avoid them.
When the fair came- I got really lucky because my date isn't an eater. He isn't a foodie at ALL (and of course he's natually really skinny); so he asked me if we could just split a few different things and I was more than happy to do that because it cut down on my portion sizes. I also didn't ask for anything- I let him choose what he wanted and just split those things with him (turned out I had half a pulled pork sandwhich and half a gyro...I was completely satisfied and didn't want anything else). There really wasn't any guilt because I ate small portions and never got stuffed. I also figured I could work out Saturday and eat healthy all day Saturday and be back on track and be more than fine. I am really proud of myself for my day yesterday. You don't know what a big deal the not eating sugar thing was for me. It was monumental because I had a conscious moment where I was like- "I really need some sugar right now I'm super stressed"...and then I reminded mysef, "no Diz, you don't need it. You'll have to start all the way over from square one and you've made it this far. THIS is what you really want- to be done with it. Drink some water." YESSSSSSS!
Today started out innocently enough. Had a healthy peach smoothie for breakfast. Packed an apple and some veggies for snacks at work. I opted not to pack a lunch because I didn't know how long I was going to be at work and I already knew the director wanted to buy us lunch- so I didn't want to waste food. I was actually pretty proud of myself for lunch too because even though we ate out at a restaurant- again I had decent sized portions and stayed away from sugar and soda...and only had one small piece of bread before the food came (and only because I was starving to death- normally I would inhale the whole basket). Even though starchy carbs are NOT on the Fat Flush diet, I am okay with winging the weekends because this is life long changing for me, and it has to be realistic. If I can stay super healthy during the week- an occasional treat with a date or going out to eat is fine. More than fine. Plus I can always work out to counter act these things. I coasted through lunch so happy with myself.
Once I got home- the ultimate test happened. And I failed it. :) My roommate had family and friends over and they were baking cookies, they had ordered pizza, and everyone was sitting around laughing and watching movies. Guess who couldn't say no to sugar any longer. I might be able to say no most of the time- but bake some cookies in MY kitchen when I'm starving from working all day and I'm finally at my breaking point. I broke down and had pizza and cookies with everyone. I don't even feel bad about the pizza really because I kept the portions under control- but I did kind of go crazy on the cookies. And I'm paying the price right now...stomach ache. Oh well! The good news is I get to start over tomorrow.